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Ministry of Stories and Hoxton Street Monster Supplies

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by Lesley Mitchell (subscribe)
Author/lecturer/Intuitive/Natural Therapist/Artist/Soap-Maker/Chef. WEBS: or Also find us under RenascentBathBody or RenascentCollege on eBay, Facebook, Pinterest, YouTube, Instagram
Published September 9th 2019
Supplies for your monsters, big and small
If you have been searching everywhere for supplies for your monster, I have found the perfect place for you. Whether your beloved is a Werewolf, Vampire, Sasquatch or some other majestic creature, you can find all sorts of special treats at the Hoxton Street monster supplies to keep your monster happy.

Consider yourself appropriately warned. *Image HMSupplies website

Set on the street named Hoxton, many of the local people are not even aware that this store exists. It is almost like it is hidden to muggles unless they are advised by an Insider (like weekend notes).

Not only am I here to tell you about this store, but I have also personally been here and met with the invisible cat and the shop assistants who have been working there apparently since 1818.

The building announces the style of store you are about to enter. *Image HMSupplies website

No matter if you are shopping for your monster or if you have some form of monstrous delight yourself. Perhaps your lips quake for a dab of thickest human snot (lemon curd) on your scones or you have been running a little low on Fang Floss (which can often be used to tie up parcels as well). From Brain Jam (raspberry) and Banshee Balls to Cubed Earwax (clotted cram fudge) with a side jar of Escalating Panic, you are sure to get service with a snarl.

Searching for friends who are difficult to buy for or looking for unique stocking fillers? The Hoxton Monster Supplies Store has got you covered. Don't forget your furry friends on special occasions with jars of savoury Dragon Treats and Werewolf Biscuits; there's something to keep all of your feathered and scaled friends happy.

All manner of treats and supplies for your monsters.. *Image HMSupplies website

If pharmacy is more your thing, choose from a range of remedies to ease and unsettle:
If needing a remedy, choose from items including Daylight.

"A highly ingenious remedy for vampires suffering Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) - provides a restorative nightly dose of daylight to combat the listlessness and apathy associated with lack of sunlight".

Perhaps some special - salts - will be just the thing. *Image Lesley Mitchell

As part of the range of tinned fear specifically tailored for children (I have heard a rumour they may contain sweets and a specially commissioned short story).

Some of the selections include:
A can of alarm to create an immediate and powerful feeling, along with sweaty palms, heart palpitation and a nagging sense something isn't quite right.
The Night Sweats quite likely and to induce aches quivers shivers and cheerful trembling now with added nightmares.

The Heebie Jeebies promise to induce an immediate tangible and most marvellous sensation of the heebie-jeebies, quickly relieving all cases at well-being, joy and general happiness. The label comes with a warning that says "whilst agreeable to the collywobbles it may contain traces of a mild peril".

An entire range of tinned fears and quirks. *Image HMSupplies website

You may find when you shop online at their website (only in the UK at this point) you'll be putting things into a "casket" to purchase them.

They have been voted London's oldest supplier of goods for the Living, Dead and Undead and were recently voted the number one kid shop in London by Time Out magazine. They find this strange as they believe they are rather evidently, a shop for monsters.

I think it is about the only time I have been curious to see what the customs department in Australia would think about my luggage had they opened and found such interesting supplies. Alas, (or maybe fortunately) although declared they did not check thoroughly. I was wondering how I would go with my bars of Impacted Earwax which warned they may contain up to 50 human hairs. (For declarations into another country, do declare them and let your customs agent check, mine advised as they were commercially made and still sealed they were fine).

More unique selections on offer. *Image HMSupplies website

Due to a rather inconvenient curse, all profits go to The Ministry of Stories - a creative writing and mentoring charity for young humans.

This is the most relevant aspect for me as they encourage young writers in the local communities to unleash their creativity. The writing workshops are entered via the shop, which naturally sparks imagination, just by entering. There is also a lovely pen pal project where you can select a monster to write to and after four weeks, you will receive your monster's reply. You can collect your letter in-store or pay an extra 1 fee to have your letter posted to you.

A great creative writing project for the locals *Image Lesley Mitchell

Click HERE for the Ministry of Stories

159 Hoxton Street London N1 6PJ

Monday Closed
Tuesday Closed
Wednesday Closed
Thursday 1pm to 5pm
Friday 1pm to 5pm
Saturday 11am to 5pm
Sunday Closed

Don't be too afraid, I have it on good authority that the staff are generally quite polite and only rarely eat the customers.

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Why? All your monster treats and supplies in one place
When: Closed Monday - Wednesday, Open Thursday & Friday 1pm to 5pm Saturday 11am to 5pm Sunday Closed
Phone: 020 7729 4159
Cost: Free entry
Your Comment
When I was in business we were always telling our clients they needed to find a point of difference for their businesses and this place has done it in spades.
by Gayle Beveridge (score: 3|9626) 865 days ago
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